Dating IM Overload

September 29, 2008

I kind of hated it, but it was kind of fun.  Like blogging, its addicting.

I’ve never been much of an IM person.  I came of age before IM.  The first person I ever IMed with was a friend of mine, Gabe.  We had known of each other for years (we grew up in the same town) and had been friends for a couple of years.  I had developed an intense crush on him during that time.  One day, after I had moved away, we ended up chatting on IM.  I somehow got carried away and admitted to him that I had feelings for him.  The feelings were not reciprocal, but that is not the point of the story.  The point is that this novel form of communication somehow lessened my inhibitions, enabling me to say something I wouldn’t otherwise say, so I’ve avoided it over the years…

One of the sites I posted my profile on was plentyoffish.com.  When I checked my email on that site this morning, someone tried to IM me.  Usually I ignore IMs, but against my better judgment, I thought, what the heck…and responded.  I decided ahead of time that I would limit the conversation to five minutes.  That was wise.  We chatted for a few minutes.  I looked at his profile, which I couldn’t figure out how to do BEFORE agreeing to chat with him. 

His profile had two red flags.  He is bi-racial and dates white women.  I’m an equal opportunity dater, probably to my detriment, so I find it problematic when people limit themselves to a particular race.  As if it isn’t hard enough to find someone as it is…by the time you factor in racial preferences, height preferences, yada yada yada, the dating pool gets reeealllly small.

I checked my email again at around 4:45pm and ended up getting chat requests from three different guys.  I figured, what the heck, the work day is over, why not talk to three people at the same time?!!  I managed to exchange email addresses with two people, both of whom noticed I was a bit distracted.  I flattered the guy who was the cutest for good measure.  Anyway, I ended up chatting with the least likely prospect, a 24 year old guy, for an hour.  When I say prospect, I mean boy toy prospect.  That’s not what I was looking for, but after my experience with Dave, I’ve been left a bit…how shall we say…frustrated and unsatisfied?!!

So, I had my first almost-internet/phone-sex with someone!  I’ve always thought that was silly and never thought I would be into it, but it was kind of fun.  We talked on the phone, too, which I normally NEVER do this early.  I guess because I knew he wasn’t a true dating prospect, I let my guard down.

Unfortunately, or probably fortunately, he lives 30 miles away.  Otherwise I would probably be having sex with him – in real life – right now.  I am glad he lives far enough away to make that impractical.  AND I am so glad that my libido seems to have returned!  I don’t know if this will be a short-lived fluke or not, but it feels good to be alive!