Husband Removal 101

(Post #3 of 4)

The day after discovering the best (or should I say only?) option for getting rid of my husband, I took Baby Bear to my sister’s house 40 minutes away.  I dropped him off, then came right back into town and went directly to the courthouse.  I waited in lines and filled out paperwork.  When I finally met with someone one-on-one, she reviewed my written statement and asked me a few pointed questions.  “Has he ever actually hit you?”  “No.  He pushed me down once, but he has never actually hit me.”

She told me that she could submit my statement to the judge for review, but it was unlikely the judge would order a personal protection order against my husband.  There had to be more concrete evidence of physical abuse.  She said she would go ahead and submit it today, or I could come back if anything happened.

So, I went home to see if I could “make something happen.”  I tried to open the front door, but it was locked.  He (I guess I’ll have to give him a name – Mark) came to the door.  He was more intoxicated than I’d ever seen him.  He normally held himself together pretty well despite drinking beer like it was water, but he was disoriented.  He thought I had been gone for 2 days…and he was disgruntled about it…and he wasn’t about to let me in the house.  (The house for which I had paid rent for 12 out of the last 14 months.)  I saw my opportunity.  I knew he wouldn’t let me past the front door, but I started to walk in the front door anyway.  He physically blocked me and I kept forging ahead.  Finally, Mark shoved me (really hard) backwards into the doorway.  Ouch…but victory! 

For having my first official experience with domestic violence, I was pretty content with myself.  It was too late in the day to go back to the courthouse, so I went back to my sister’s house and spent the night there.  The next morning, I went straight to court and successfully got my very own personal protection order.

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3 Responses to Husband Removal 101

  1. cindydating says:

    Note: The last thing I would ever want to do is offend anyone. I hope that no one interprets my words as belittling to the problem of domestic violence or dismissive to those who have experienced domestic violence.

  2. cindydating says:

    The above note is in response to a comment in my moderation queue. I am choosing not to approve the comment directly because that would allow the person to post future comments without my approval.

    However, for the sake of dialog, and in case I did somehow offend this person, I am pasting their comment [sic] below:

    So you ran over there and started shit???? LMAO!!! Why would you want a personal protection order if he has Never phisically harmed you? You got pushed out of a doorway… and you think that is violence. LMAO that is so funny OMG are you serious? You have lived a very very sheltered life. That is why it is unlikely the judge would order a personal protection order against your husband. If that judge read this post He would talk major shit to you and so should anyone else that reads this because what you did was very very wrong

    To clarify, I was pushed into the door jamb, not “out of the doorway.” The written statement to the judge said exactly that. I did not lie to the judge. The judge granted the PPO based on the above incident. If I had wanted to lie, I would have done that the day before and saved myself a lot of time and driving.

    This post is the third out of four to give background on my son’s father. My use of humor is meant to lighten things up, not minimize spousal abuse (or child abuse, which is what the story is really about).

  3. My $.02…

    Everyone has to walk their own path. I did not see anything in the above story that would point to you belittling domestic violence.

    I read the story as a woman who was trying to find a solution to a very difficult situation. If DeadBeatHusband refuses to leave… how DO you get him out? Yes, I suppose you could leave but as you pointed out you were the one paying rent so it should be your right to stay.

    The laws were set up a certain way, nothing could be done otherwise. You were just trying to find a solution.

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